Harville Hendrix

Getting the Love You Want rests on an uncomfortable proposition: that people unconsciously select partners who reproduce the unmet needs of childhood, because that is the wound the psyche is trying to finish.

Imago therapy, which Hendrix developed with his wife Helen LaKelly Hunt, uses a structured dialogue where each partner mirrors, validates and empathises before responding, which feels artificial and is meant to.

The approach has a large practitioner network and considerably less trial evidence than emotionally focused therapy. The dialogue structure itself is what most couples take from it.