Chapter 88

JADE

Susan and Jade glared at Mark, awaiting further explanation.

‘What do you mean you’re my Match?’ Jade asked, shaking her head. ‘Why would you say that?’

‘Mark?’ asked Susan, puzzled. ‘What’s going on?’

Mark hung his head and closed his eyes. He took a deep breath before he spoke again. ‘Kev and I did our tests at the same time, and the results came back on the same day, when he was in hospital for one of his early chemo sessions,’ he explained quietly. ‘I opened my email and I’d been Matched with you, Jade, but Kev, he didn’t have anyone. Mum, you remember how desperate he was to know there was someone out there for him after the diagnosis?’

Susan nodded.

‘I deleted his email and told him he’d been Matched but I hadn’t. I just wanted him to be happy. So I paid for your contact details, Jade, and sent them to his phone, so he never saw the original email. You should have seen the look on his face when he realised you existed, even if you were thousands of miles away. It was back when he still looked like the old Kev, remember Mum? He even begged the doctors to let him fly to England to visit you, but they wouldn’t allow it and he couldn’t get the insurance to cover the trip.’

Jade could see Susan nodding, remembering when this had happened.

‘As the treatment got into full swing, it was so awful to watch him starting to lose his hair and weight and become a brother I barely recognised. But I knew what I had done was worth it when I’d see the old Kev reappear in his eyes and watch him smile when he got your texts and your calls.’

Jade thought back to the day she had first received confirmation of a Match. The notification had come through during her lunch break

at work and she’d been so thrilled that she’d paid for her link’s details without giving much attention to his name. Almost immediately, she’d received a text from Kevin introducing himself and, from their first conversation, she just assumed he was her Match. She liked his warmth and enthusiasm, and immediately warmed to him. It was a stark contrast to her feelings of failure for having a job she hated and living with her parents.

‘We just started talking and hit it off,’ Jade said quietly. ‘I didn’t think to check it was the right name.’

Jade felt her mother-in-law’s disappointment dissipate, but, for her, her anger only grew.

‘I’m so sorry, Jade,’ Mark said. ‘But believe me, I know how hard it’s been for you over the last few weeks. From the moment I opened the front door to you, I felt those explosions they talk about. And I hate that I’ve hurt the one girl in the world I love.’

‘You have no idea how much you’ve hurt me,’ Jade replied solemnly, and dug her fingernails into the palm of her hands to hold back her rising temper.

‘I do know, honestly … hearing Kev talk to you on the phone every night and watching him in the lounge grinning as each of your messages came through, knowing it should have been me reading them and not him … it was hell. I’d wonder what you were saying to each other and what you felt about him, and I couldn’t say a damned thing. But I never expected you to actually turn up at the house. And then when you did it was both my worst nightmare and the best thing ever at the same time. Suddenly here you were, the one I was supposed to be with, on my doorstep and staying under my roof, but it was my brother you were here to see and he was head over heels in love with you.’

Jade could feel her eyes pooling and she blinked the tears back, trying to keep a handle on her emotions. Part of her wanted to slap Mark, but the other part wanted to hold on to him for dear life.

‘You lied to me … you lied to Kevin … you lied to the people you say you loved – how could you do that?’ she asked. ‘I’ve spent weeks trapped in this nightmare, beating myself up over why I wasn’t in love with him and thinking I was this selfish, heartless bitch. And you watched me going through absolute shite but you didn’t say a

word. You didn’t even try to hint that all wasn’t as it seemed – you just let me deal with this all by myself. If you’d just given me a clue and let me work it out, then I could have at least decided if I wanted to go along with it or not. But you took the choice away from me. You used me, Mark, and that’s what hurts the most.’

‘Please try and understand why I did it.’

‘I do, and that’s the only thing stopping me from punching you right now. I get it, you had to put Kevin first. But it takes me a long time to trust someone and, no matter what my body feels for you, I don’t think my head or my heart will ever trust you again.’

‘Please don’t say that,’ Mark begged. ‘Just give us a chance.’

‘I’m sorry, I really don’t think I can.’

Jade hurried out of the lounge and back to the guest house, slamming her bedroom door shut behind her, along with all the feelings she’d ever held for her Match.