Chapter Twenty-Eight

Xander watched as Faith finished with the clay she'd been using, carefully putting the unused portion away. They'd gone to the craft store earlier, and she'd talked him into not only buying her the markers she wanted, but also clay, so she could make animals to set around her bedroom. He was impressed with how well she molded the clay and how realistic the animals looked.

"Want me to set them up on the shelf to dry all night?" He nodded to the board the animals now sat on.

"Yeah, thanks. Do you think we can get more clay tomorrow?" Faith asked as she went to wash her hands.

"I think you still have enough. Besides, your dad will be home tomorrow, and I can't sneak you things when he's around. He's already going to kill me for spoiling you today."

"You're not spoiling me. I needed those things." Faith grinned.

"If I got you what you needed, we'd be at the bookstore and not the craft store." He tapped her gently on the top of her head.

"When will Dad be home?"

"I'm not sure. He had some stuff to do at work. It's a big case they are working on and it might take a few more hours." He sat down at the table with her. "We can watch a movie or something if you want."

When Matt had been asked to come into work, Xander didn't think twice about offering to stay with Faith. She trusted him, and there had been a few other times Matt had left them alone when he had to run errands or other things.

They were still slowly moving things from Matt's old house to his, and sticking the rest in storage. The plan was to sell the old house, then find a new one that Faith felt safe in. It was going to take time, but Xander didn't mind having them stay with him. He'd come a long way in the last few months, going from a man who never had anyone over to living with the man he was fucking.

"You pick the movie this time." Faith went to the cupboard and pulled out the microwavable popcorn. "I'll cook."

"Okay, but you better make two. You know I won't get any if you only make one." He winked at her.

"Liar." She laughed. "You're the one who eats it all." She grabbed a second bag out.

He kept an eye on her as he scanned the list of kid-friendly movies, finally settling on something about a pig living on a farm. It was hardly the type of movie he'd pick to enjoy, but at least it wasn't animated like so many others they'd sat through.

"I hear you're going out with your grandma this weekend. Are you excited?"

Faith frowned. "I don't know. She wants to take me to some fair thing.

She says I'll have fun, but Grandma is kind of boring."

It was the first time she was going to go out without Matt around, and they were all curious how it would go. Matt was more a mess about letting her go than Faith was about going, and Xander didn't blame him. It was hard to get over the fear that she could be taken again, and as much as Matt wanted to be with her all the time to protect her, it was unrealistic to think he could. The older Faith got, the more she'd go out with others, and it was something Matt had to get used to. Xander planned on distracting Matt the whole time as best he could to keep his mind off what Faith was up to, and to keep him from driving his mother crazy with phone calls checking up on them every ten minutes.

"Grandparents can be boring. Mine used to travel a lot, then they'd come home and make me watch videos of their vacations. I was like seven, trying to understand where they'd gone and why they were so excited to see boring stuff." Xander reached into the fridge and pulled out two juice boxes. He'd much rather a beer, but as with everything else in his life, things were different when you were hanging with a ten-year-old. He'd cut his smoking habit in half since Faith moved in.

As they sat down on the couch with their popcorn and apple juice, Xander thought about how different his life had become. He'd never dreamed he would be sitting with a child watching movies in his own living room. It wasn't who he was, or at least who he had been. Obviously, it was who he was now. He glanced over at Faith and smiled as he hit play. "Don't fall asleep."

She rolled her eyes. "It's early still. You're the one who falls asleep on the couch all the time."

"I'm old. That's what old people do," he teased.

"You're not old." She tugged on his beard. "See, no gray hair. Old people have gray hair like Grandma or Gretchen."

"That is true, they do. So, I guess I'm just lazy then?" He nudged her with his elbow, glad that she was finally getting used to the small touches and didn't shy away when he was close to her.

"Yep, Daddy is too. He fell asleep in my bed the other night while reading me a story. I had to finish the book myself."

Xander laughed. He remembered that night. Matt hadn't come into bed until well after midnight. Xander thought he'd been talking to Faith, but when he'd stumbled into bed, Matt had mumbled something about falling asleep on Faith's bed and his back hurting from laying on the stuffed animals that she kept around her.

"Enjoy being young." He smiled down at her, sad that she had to grow up too fast in so many ways.

Settling down, they watched the movie in silence, the only sound was the crunch of the popcorn they ate. He loved sitting with her like this, doing everyday things that not so long ago she was at risk of never experiencing again.

When the movie ended, Faith turned to him, reaching up and pulling free a piece of popcorn that had dropped into his beard. "That was a good movie. Can we get a pig?"

Xander nearly choked. "A pig? Um, no. I might help you talk your dad into a dog or cat, but I'm pretty sure he will say no to a pig."

"You'd let me get a dog, right? It's just Daddy saying no?"

"I would, but it's not up to me."

Faith sighed, then suddenly looked up at him, staring straight into his eyes.

"Are you going to be my other daddy?"

Xander froze, unsure what to say. Matt had talked to Faith soon after she'd seen them kiss about him dating a man, and made sure she was really okay with it, but other than that, their relationship hadn't even been talked about. As comfortable as he was with Faith and Matt, he hadn't ever thought about the long term. The simple thought that Faith was asking meant she was thinking about the future and was becoming attached. Xander swallowed hard, unsure how to answer. "You know I don't want to replace

your mom, right?" He hoped talking about her mother might distract her from the conversation she'd started to have with him.

"Oh, I know. My mommy will always be my mommy, but I have a friend, Claire. She has two daddies. She was adopted. She sees her mommy sometimes, but her mommy was nice enough to let her daddies raise her.

All her mommy did was carry her in her tummy. I know you won't be my mommy, but since she's dead, you can be my daddy now, right?"

Xander's pulse raced. How had he gone from casual sex to having Faith want him as her father? As flattered as he was, the thought of settling down, of committing to something long-term, scared the hell out of him. It was one thing when it was just Matt and him trying to have fun, enjoy each other's company, but now Faith wanted something long-term, and Xander wasn't ready for that. He'd never been the type of guy to settle down. "Um, I'm not sure if I'd make a good daddy, but I do promise I'll always be your friend."

"You love me and Daddy, don't you?"

Xander took a deep breath, unable to think clearly. What was he supposed to say? He stared at Faith, seeing the hope and trust in her deep brown eyes, and his chest tightened. "I care about you and your daddy very much. You know I would do anything for either one of you, but what you are talking about is something more."

Faith sighed. "It doesn't have to be so hard. Adults are funny." She shook her head. "If you like each other, why can't you be my other daddy?"

"Because that is something more, something that your daddy and I would have to decide later. Right now, we just want to make sure you're okay. Let you know how happy we are that you're home. Is that alright?"

Faith nodded. "I guess. I just like it here. Daddy's looking for a new house and I don't want to go. I like your house. It's safe here."

Xander would never regret bringing Faith to his house, but now she wanted to stay, and he wasn't sure what to do about that. Maybe he could move and let Matt keep the house.

What he had with Matt was comfortable, and Xander wouldn't deny that he cared about Matt and Faith more than he did any other people in the world, but she was talking marriage, lifelong commitments. That wasn't something Xander was ready for. He wasn't the settle down and play house kind of guy. "We'll figure it out. I promise you that no matter what happens, where you move, or what happens between your daddy and me, I will

always make sure you are safe, okay? I won't let anyone hurt you again." It was a promise he would do everything he could to keep, even if it meant following her life well into adulthood to make sure she was safe.

Faith moved so quickly, he almost fell when she threw herself into his arms. It was the first time she'd let him hug her, and he welcomed her, wrapping his arms around her and smiling. He might be able to run from his feelings for Matt, but he couldn't run from his feelings for her. "I love you."

He kissed the top of her head as she hugged him back.

"I love you too, and I hope you're wrong. You're who I want for a daddy." She pulled back. "Daddy said I could have ice cream, can I?"

Xander laughed. "Of course, but then you have to brush your teeth and get ready for bed without a fight, okay?"

She nodded as she grabbed his hand. "Come on, I know where Daddy hid the chocolate syrup."

Xander did the only thing he could do and let her lead him to the kitchen. He hoped when the time came for this all to end, he'd be able to walk away without hurting her, because he was sure that leaving her was going to tear him apart.

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