Aziz Gazipura

Not Nice separates kindness from niceness and argues that the second is a fear response: agreeing to things you resent, apologising reflexively, avoiding every conflict, and calling the result being a good person.

Gazipura holds a doctorate in clinical psychology and the book follows recognisable cognitive behavioural lines, with graded exposure to small refusals.

He is direct that the pattern often traces to childhood conditions where approval was contingent, and the writing is warmer and more repetitive than a clinical text, which suits the audience it is aimed at.